under my knees

I woke with one of those headaches that lie coiled and ready to strike if you make a sudden move. I've learned to respect them and tread lightly.
My body has been trying to get my attention for a couple of weeks. Stress can be hard to process and there seems to be more of it than ever. Now why is that. I always thought the lives of adults seemed so serene. How blind is youth.
In fact, life is full of all sorts of conflicting things; the wonderful and the worrisome, and you can't readily tell them apart at first glance. Good new is often dressed up as bad news, and vise versa. And of course, we don't see the end of the story, the curve in the road.
I wish I was braver, had more faith, like a rock.
There is an old adage, make hay while the sun shines. When the going is good, prepare for when it won't be. Because it will be again, and then won't be and then will...........This is a lesson I am clearly having trouble learning.
The winds are going to blow.
The house is going to tremble.
But I am never alone.
I can't grasp the love of God, I just throw myself out there in faith.
I don't understand the mystery of prayer at all, but I am grateful that He hears.
And at my lowest place, when I see myself in all of my weakest failings, I feel the Rock under my knees.