Tuesday, July 16, 2013

how to

How to Make a Summer Quilt

1. Drive to the 'local' quilt shop that is geographically furthest from your home
2. Choose the hottest day on record
3. Take a car without air conditioning
4. Also take your elderly mother
5. Make sure she has inexplicably worn long johns under her dress.
Do not notice this until you are on your way home.
6. Take two hours to choose ten fabrics, a ratio of twelve minutes per selection.
7. Make sure sale ended the previous day
8. Blush as two clerks and a manager find a way to give you the discount anyway
9. Drive cross country in search of cold drinks in direct defiance of Road Trip Recommendation Number One--Always take the nearest freeway entrance and always, always know where it is
10. Drive as quickly as possible to activate manual air conditioning
11. Stagger up the stairs of home at last, feeling like a wide-eyed raisin
12. Calmly show off purchase later to interested parties
13. As the sun riseth, do thou like wise
13. Cut, sew, press, cut, sew, press, press, press
14. Gasp in amazement
15. Begin mental preparation for basting and quilting. This may include, but is not limited to pacing, sighing, sweating, pondering, procrastinating and hunkering
16. Tell everyone that you love quilting


CitricSugar said...

Amen! That's almost exactly how I make one. Minus my mother. It's unlikely to find her in a quilt shop.

Great post!

Anonymous said...

and I love this post too! Your mother in her longjohns made me laugh out loud. Sarah